POPS: No Father's Day

The best part about working at a clinic specializing in male infertility is seeing all the hot dudes come through shooting blanks and hoping they can buy their manhood. What tools! Actually, they're perfect candidates for ballbusting because if you pop one, it isn't like you're ruining a family tree or anything.

Anyway, I had my eye on Clint since the moment he walked into the clinic. He was a breathtakingly handsome, forty-five-year-old accountant whose hefty - but basically non-functioning - nuts might as well have been full of sand. I was only a lab technician, but we became casual friends. He was so desperate to start a family and he would have made some beautiful kids. The more Clint confided in how much he wanted to knock up his wife, the more I wanted to destroy him. It was to the point that I barely made eye contact when we spoke, I was just fixated on his bulging jeans.

It was early morning on Father's Day - of all days - when I tracked him down jogging in the Ramble. He looked so hot sweaty and smiling at me. He was actually pleased by the 'coincidence' that we were out jogging at the same time. We made it about a mile when I faked an injury and Clint offered to help me back to my car. His beefy body was pressed against mine and he smelled amazing. As soon as we got back to my van I pulled the toy gun out of my waistband and put it on his chest. I had spray painted it grey so it looked like the real thing and he was so scared and confused, he was begging when I struck him in the head and dumped him in the back.

Clint came to a couple hours later, groggy and not really aware where he was. We hadn't actually gone too far, I was able to spirit him into the basement of an under-construction condo tower. It's amazing what favors you can get if you just offer to share the footage...

I had him on his knees with his arms behind his back tied to a beam and to stop him from leaning forward or trying to be a hero and stand, I tied a thick rope around his neck to hold his head to the beam. He was naked to show off his awesome Daddy-I'd-Like-to-Fuck body and I had wrapped thin string around his balls pulling them away from his body where they rested on top of a small anvil. The string of the noose extended so that it was secured by the weight of the anvil, trapping his nuts in place.

"Hey, what's going on! What are you doing!"

Clint screamed. It wasn't fear, per se. It was genuine confusion. The nice, nerdy guy from the clinic he considered a friend had just pistol-whipped him and thrown him in a van.  I walked toward him as he got his bearings and told him to smile for the camera. I pointed to a camcorder on a tripod nearby aimed at him and zoomed on his nuts. I reached down to grab them - they were massive. Literally the largest balls I had ever seen on a human and that's including porn! They were monstrously huge.

"Holy fuck!"  

Clint realized that a huge iron weight was hanging about three feet over his trapped testicles by a rope I'd suspended from one of the exposed ceiling beams. It was a dense block that was so heavy I needed help just to get suspended. Even the ceiling joint seemed to creak under the load. 

"I've wanted to do this to you so long," I whispered in his ear.

He was begging, but I ignored him as I pulled a lighter out of my pocket and held it near the rope. Clint instantly knew what I was going to do and started sobbing and begging.

I flicked the lighter and held it up to the rope. It took a few attempts before the rope ignited, what must have been an agonizingly long time for the handsome wanna-be dad. The rope kind of smoldered before fully catching, but even then I could tell it was going to take a bit before the thick fibers to started to fail.

Clint's handsome face was deformed by terror. His eyes were quivering and huge as they darted between watching the slowly burning rope and his balls in the shadow of the weight.

"No! Not my nuts! Please!"

I squatted to get a better view. The smell of smoke was thick.

His eyes were fixated on his balls. He was crying and trying to get loose but was no use, his huge nuts stayed right in place. 

"No! Please! Dude! What are you doing!"

I licked my lips as the weight started to sway and I heard snapping sounds as the fibers of the rope started to give way. It wouldn't be long now...

"Dude! Please! Not my balls, please! I want kids! I want..."

There was a thunderous snap. Both of our eyes were fixed on the weight which seemed to fall in slow motion. I mean obviously, it wasn't really slow motion, but thanks to the camera I could slow it down afterward.

The weight came slamming down and Clint let out an anguished scream as it smashed into his nuts which were instantly compressed nearly totally flat. To my delight - and his nightmare - that was entirely too flat for a man's balls, especially a donkey pair like his, and they both instantly burst.

Actually, let me use a better word. They didn't just burst. They exploded. A thick spray of gunk went flying out from under the weight, the ruined tendril-like remains of his nuts splattering several feet. His chest was plastered. I absolutely could not believe the huge, disgusting mess but just the sight of it got me rock hard! I couldn't wait to watch the footage. Over and over.

"Happy Father's Day, Clint,"

I teased him as his eyes - still wide in shock - slowly closed.

Update: This has been illustrated! Check it out at Orchidometer's blog here